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15.6.19

So different

Child #1 -- Hulk, approx 5 years old but comparisons may be based on his personality when he was younger
Child #2 -- Little Viking Girl, approx 18 months old

Child #1 - hates to be outside, even in "perfect" weather
Child #2 - doesn't understand why I won't let her outside in subfreezing weather

Child #1 - ate dinner with a wet cloth next to his plate because he hated getting his hands dirty, he would never play in the dirt, hated sand and grass
Child #2 - will dig up the plants in my garden and eat sand

Child #1 - hated walking, loved the stroller, insisted on being carried
Child #2 - prefers walking/running to the stroller or being carried

Child #1 - would never play on his own
Child #2 - prefers playing on her own

Child #1 - hated climbing, is still afraid of falling
Child #2 - will climb a 10ft jungle-jim if I turn my back on her

Child #1 - calm, would sit still
Child #2 - always moving, will run away from home

Child #1 - not a big fan of animals
Child #2 - likes to pretend that she's a dog

Child #1 - hated slides
Child #2 - loves slides

Child #1 - had a favorite book and would only ever want that book to be read
Child #2 - loves books, all books, any books

Child #1 - I was his comfort "object"
Child #2 - has her two dolls, three blankets, backpack, pillow...

Child #1 - never gets a sunburn
Child #2 - cannot be in direct sunlight for more than five minutes without burning

Child #1 - organized, liked cleaning up
Child #2 - complete chaos

Child #1 - hated being naked
Child #2 - prefers her birthday suit

Child #1 - if we were out and he wouldn't come when I called I would threaten to leave him and he would come running
Child #2 - if I threaten to leave she'll smile, wave "bye", and run the other way

Child #1 - enjoyed bath time but otherwise hated pools and water
Child #2 - is a water baby

Child #1 - momma's boy
Child #2 - daddy's girl

Child #3 - ???

24.9.18

Another Talk


Our church is a lay organization - meaning everyone volunteers. The people that give "sermons" on Sunday are members of the congregation, we all take turns. There isn't a sign-up sheet or an orderly rotation, it's just whomever the Bishop asks but he's good at giving members a chance and is happy to accept volunteers.

JC and I received a call late Wednesday night asking if we could give talks (sermons) the upcoming Sunday. This was unusual for various reasons: the time of night, the short notice (usually people are given at least two weeks to prepare), and that both of us were asked (because those giving talks sit up on a stand facing the congregation, not a great place for our active kids so we had to do a trade-off in-between our talks). We also had a busy week ahead of us leaving very little time for us to prepare. But it worked out. For me, this was the easiest talk I have ever written and probably the best one I have ever given. I really feel that when we are called, the Lord helps us. I know He was there when I wrote this talk, providing inspiration, directing my research, and reminding me of personal stories I could use that applied to my message. And I know that He was there when I gave my talk, calming me and helping me.

So, as we have a tradition on this blog of sharing our talks, here you go:

My name is EC. My family has been in the ward for almost a year and a half now. Which is about the longest we’ve ever lived in a given ward, so that means we’ll probably be moving soon. Just kidding Bishop. We’re originally from Oregon, we came here for school and work. We enjoy the outdoors, biking, heavy rain, and we know that Tillamook Creamery makes the best ice cream. Ever. Sorry Graeters.  

As a family, we’ve lately been reading in Mosiah. After we read, we discuss with Hulk (our five year old son) what we read. And by discuss, what I really mean is we talk at him while he jumps on his bed. A large section of Mosiah is dedicated to the teaching of a man named Abinadi.

 Every time we read about Abinadi we ask Hulk, “Who is Abinadi?”

For the first month or so Hulk would respond, “I don’t know!”

We would then explain that Abinadi is a prophet.

We would then ask Hulk, “What is a prophet?”

And Hulk would respond, “I don’t know!”

You can imagine what our family scripture study is like.

If you ask Hulk now, “what is a prophet?” He’ll respond, “Someone who teaches about God and Jesus Christ.” So, we’ve made some progress.

The scriptures continually support the importance of having prophets and their role as the mouth piece of the Lord. Heavenly Father has spoken “by the mouth of his holy prophets, which have been since the world began.” The primary hymn book has a song that teaches that Adam, our first earthly father, was also our first prophet.

A prophet is a messenger from God. Prophets are teachers and they instruct us on the will and character of our Heavenly Father and His son, Jesus Christ. Because of their calling, prophets have a very personal relationship with God. When Heavenly Father was instructing Aaron and Miriam after they had complained against the prophet Moses, He taught them concerning this personal relationship saying, “If there be a prophet among you, I the Lord will make myself known unto him in a vision, and will speak unto him in a dream.”

When the Lord called the prophet Jeremiah, the Lord told Jeremiah, “Go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak”



When a prophet speaks, we would be wise to listen because they are truly speaking the words Heavenly Father would have them say.

Another important role of Prophets is to preach of righteousness and when we begin to stray from the truthfulness of the gospel, it is the prophet that calls us back, restores the true faith, and removes false views.


Throughout scriptural history prophets have been called to cry repentance. Noah to the unrighteous people warning them of the flood, Jonah to Nineveh, Daniel to Nebuchadnezzar and the people of Babylon, Alma the Younger and the sons of Mosiah to the wicked Lamanites, and in return Samuel the Lamanite to the wicked Nephites. Abinadi to the unrighteous King Noah. When the Lord called Isaiah to preach to ancient Israel He instructed him to, “cry aloud, spare not,lift up thy voice like a trumpet, and shew my people their transgression, andthe house of Jacob their sins.”

Prophets are our lifeline to the Lord, our guides as they strive to keep us from wandering off the straight and narrow path back to our Heavenly Father. They are there when we turn our back on the Lord.

Is that not a sacred calling? Prophets are there for us, to remind us of our purpose, of the plan of salvation, of our loving Heavenly Father, and of our purpose here on Earth. So when we become distracted with the things of this world, Prophets lovingly guide us back.

One afternoon, during high school, I was walking through the parking lot of a mall with a few friends as we made our way to a restaurant. While we walked, we talked, but one friend was busily texting on her phone. Since she was absorbed by her phone, she was clueless to the large puddles in the road or even oncoming cars that our group moved to avoid. So I would gently grab her arm and steer her as we walked. This was a funny event but how often are we so distracted that we don’t notice the dangers that lie ahead before we reach our end destination? Prophets are there to guide us but they are much more direct. Instead of grabbing our arm they tell us to put the phone away so that we can better face the challenges that lay ahead.

In two weeks, we will have the sacred opportunity to hear the words of our living prophets. These are men and women that the Lord has called to teach us of His will and character and to call us back to the fold.

Elder D Todd Christofferson, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles gave a devotional while still a member of the Quorum of the Seventy. His devotional centered on the appreciation and reverence for sacred things and he instructed members of the audience to ask themselves, “Do I see the calling of the prophets and apostles as sacred? Do I treat their counsel seriously, or is it a light thing with me? Do your actions show that you want to know and do what he teaches? Do you actively study his words and the statements of the Brethren? Is this something you hunger and thirst for? If so, you have a sense of the sacredness of the calling of prophets as the witnesses and messengers of the Son of God.”

When our modern day prophets are called, they join the company of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. We have been instructed to read our scriptures often. When we read the scriptures, we read of the prophetic words and counsels of prophets from previous dispensations talking to us. If it’s important to read the scriptures then it is important to take heed when a prophet from today, talks to us today, in real life. We demonstrate our love and respect to the Lord and our understanding of the sacred calling of prophets as we actively listen to their words during General Conference and then go back and review those words and apply them to our lives over the next six months until the next General Conference and hopefully, after that, the rest of our lives.

This last General Conference, Elder David A Bednar taught that, “meekness is a defining attribute of the Redeemer and is distinguished by righteous responsiveness, willing submissiveness, and strong self-restraint.” Meekness helps us overcome pride and it is a Christ-like attribute that we have access to because of the atonement. Elder Bednar gave President Nelson and President Eyring as examples of meekness when they responded to President Monson’s invitation to study, ponder, and apply the truths contained in the Book of Mormon. Here were two apostles of the Lord, who have read the Book of Mormon probably more times than I have years in my life. Yet they responded to President Monson’s invitation and felt the blessings as they demonstrated to the Lord the sacred calling of a Prophet.

The talk on meekness by Elder Bednar, which I just mentioned, I had to review at least a half dozen times before I fully understood its message. It was not something I understood after listening to it once during General Conference, it was something I had to go back to several times. But, by going back I demonstrated to the Lord that the calling of a Prophet is sacred to me and this allowed the Lord to soften my heart so that I could receive the message He had prepared for me.

I know that we have a prophet today, President Russel M Nelson. I know that the Lord is still there for us, that He loves us. General Conference for this year will be on October 6th and 7th. You may live stream it here (or even go back and review past conferences here).

5.6.18

Overeducated Mother

I am no stranger to road trips. Growing up, that was how we traveled. We would drive from where ever we were living at the time (Missouri, Washington, Idaho...) to visit family in Oregon. For some reason, when my dad drove he would listen to this super boring talk show. My siblings and I hated it. We couldn't understand how he could stay awake while listening to it. Fast forward twenty years and that talk show is my radio station of choice.

I love NPR (but I do not love every episode). I could talk in length on my opinion on public broadcasting... My favorite episodes air on Saturdays around 11am – "Ask Me Another" and "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me..." A few weeks ago they had someone call in on "Wait, Wait..." that described herself as an "overeducated mother."

I think this is a common thought: why spend years and $$ getting an advanced degree if you're just going to stay home with the kids. And this bothers me.

FIRST – it's not just staying home with the kids. I don't sit around on facebook all day and let my kids do whatever they want. I may participate in hot chocolate parties, but I also work as a structural engineer when designing lego buildings, I work as a construction engineer when creating wooden train track stations. I answer complex questions like, "how does smell work", "why is the sky blue", "how can we hear?"

I am the lead nutritionist and chef in our family. I design our meal plans and make sure Hulk eats a variety of healthy foods. I make sure that he limits his sugar intake and I try to teach him to listen to his body.

I am a spiritual advisor, I read scriptures and teach Hulk about Heavenly Father and how to pray. I try to look for opportunities throughout the day that demonstrate Heavenly Father's love and compassion for us.

I am a therapist and psychologist. I teach Hulk how to manage his emotions and how to express himself. We go over his day and discuss what made him sad or happy.

I am a social advocate. When Hulk starts trying to control his sister I teach him about consent and that he needs to show respect. When Hulk asks me when "will [his] skin turn brown?" I teach him that people have different color skin, just like we have different color eyes or hair, and there is beauty in that.

While growing up in the LDS church, the young women (ages 12-18 years) were also honored on Mother's Day. This was kind of confusing (and had slight feel of misogyny). We were "future mothers". Today, I have a different view. Not every woman can (or wants, or even should) have children. AND THAT'S FINE. Physically having a child does not make you a mother.  If the term "mother" were defined by our ability to bear a healthy child, then the term "she's not a good mother" would not make any sense in its common use.

A mother is someone who teaches, instructs, guides, loves, cares, prepares... It's a verb, a never ending action. My son's preschool teachers mother him, his leaders at church mother him, his pediatrician mothers him, and I get to mother him every day. It's a challenge and a blessing. But it's never something I just do. It's something I am continually learning.

Hulk checking the cell culture at my work
SECOND – I strongly believe that my advanced degree helps me be a better mother. By obtaining my Master's (while mothering two children) I hope that I have demonstrated to my kids the importance of education.

Because of my degree I can better answer Hulk's questions. When he asks why the sky is blue, how rainbows are made, or how mirrors work, we discuss light refraction versus reflection. When he asks how bicycles stay up or why things fall we discuss centripetal force and gravity. 

When Hulk asks how people become sick, I can explain bacteria and viruses. The importance of eating healthy and getting lots of sleep. I can teach him how the organs in his body work and why we need to stay hydrated (he likes to drink water to "make more blood").

I don't want to romanticize this too much, he's only four and I do have my days where I just can't any more. He doesn't understand everything I try to teach him and I do have to simplify concepts because his brain is not ready to grasp them. But because of my degree, I know and understand these concepts and can introduce them to him.

I also have an understanding of my knowledge gap. I know when to tell Hulk "I don't know. Let's find out."

I also strongly believe that we are here on this earth to learn, so I intend to learn as much as I can and I hope to never stop learning. And I hope my children will be the same way.

Terracotta Warriors at the Cincinnati Art Museum